Well, it’s about time for the festivities to begin. I’m having a party at my place, and I’m all ready and no one is here yet so I thought I’d blog to kill some time. Oh, and I practiced today so it makes sense to put it down. I slept in to 6:30 this morning since I didn’t have to go into the lab today, and so I got to the studio at 7. It was nice and warm! Yippee! Funny thing was, like four other people who are usually the early birds showed up right at the same time. We all decided to sleep in today. It was nice doing only first series. Finally, my body felt better. No more stiffness/soreness. I put castor oil on my knees last night and that helped a bunch- they felt much better today. All in all a good end to the week. The sun finally came out during the day for the first time since I’ve been home. And then it went back into the clouds and the rain began again. Spent the day getting supplies for tonight, then lounging around and watching a movie. Soooo nice. Happy last day of 2004!
Cold December 30, 2004
The room was 66 degrees when I walked in. Lame. Someone had turned the thermostat, which is on a timer, off. It was cold enough that I considered only doing a half practice. Instead I decided to hunker down next to a space heater (we had three in the room trying to help it warm up in there), keep my beanie, sweatshirt, and pants on and just take it one pose at a time, and see how far I wanted to go. Turned out that I did my whole practice. I actually was able to get pretty good sweat going. Unfortunately, I didn’t ever really get loose. Right from the beginning, my hamstrings were sore, and I found a lot of muscle resistance throughout. It was a pretty hard practice. The kind where I wasn’t really enjoying myself too much. But I did get through it. I decided about halfway through to take everything down to 80 percent effort. Keep the bandhas and alignment and muscles all where they need to be, but ease off the pressure, the attempt to go further. I think this change of attitude is the only reason I got through my whole practice. I was able to conserve energy that way. By the time I got to backbends, I was pretty tired, and I did my stand-up/drop-backs, but left out the assisted parts. My teacher came over and gave me an adjustment in paschimottanasana, and when he was done, he said “pretty good for starting at 66 degrees.” I had forgotten how cold the beginning was at that point. Interesting. I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised that it wasn’t as juicy of a practice as it could have been. Even though I was sweating, I probably didn’t ever get to my normal warmth.
It’s been raining here nonstop since I got home. I kinda like it. It never did this in San Diego. Or Orange County. If it rained for three days it was like some kind of miracle/plague. I like running around in the rain, being out in it. I guess it’s all part of my general love of water. Plus, the humidity when it rains provides a wonderful relief from the dryness of winter. I got stuff finished up at the lab today so that I was able to leave at 2:30 and don’t have to go in tomorrow. I think I’m going to sleep in a bit! Maybe show up at practice at *gasp* 7am. That way it’ll be warm for sure.
Wednesday December 29, 2004
Ahhh. Better today. The room was five degrees warmer than yesterday when I walked in, which was very nice. That’s all it took, and I was much warmer today than yesterday. Consequently, the joints were in better shape, although part of that has to do with the practice and detoxification from yesterday, too. Overall the practice was good. I felt stronger and more connected today, though my hamstrings were a little sore from Tuesday. Right now they’re very sore. Been pounding the water today to assist in the muscle recovery. These days I carry a nalgene around with me to monitor how much water I get in. If I don’t put down at least four (usually five) not counting random glasses of water in restaurants, if any, then I’m not going to be in good shape the next day. Laghuvajrasana was much better today than yesterday. In fact, my dhanurasanas were better too. Lots more arch, due to more stamina in the thighs. In laghuvajrasana I was able to lower to my head without a problem. Getting back up without releasing my hands from my calves is still elusive. I had to do it twice today, too. After I finished the first one, my teacher came over and had me go through the whole thing again, with adjustments. Keeping with the theme of multiple tries, I had to do my whole assisted backbending sequence twice also. The reason was that after doing my drop-back/stand-ups I waited for my teacher for a while and he didn’t come so I thought he was giving me the pass. I proceeded to do the half-backs and chakra bhandasana by myself, as I occasionally do. My back was really open, and I was able to get my fingers slightly around my heels with no assistance. Unfortunately, I didn’t walk my hands back far enough for standing up and I didn’t make it all the way up. I came back down kinda hard, and when I got back to standing, I felt like I over-did it there in my low back. And then my teacher arrived. I told him I’d already walked in by myself (which he knows I do from time to time ’cause he’s commented on it) and instead of letting me off the hook, he just said, “we’ll just do a light version then….” C’est la vive. Was a little uncomfortable, but nothing bad. Didn’t do an ankle grabber or anything though.
I’ve put in a full day at the lab (still here in fact), so I’m looking forward to getting some food! Very tired, actually, though most of that is low blood sugar. It looks like I’ve got my next tattoo timing figured out. I’m even going back down to San Diego for it. Haven’t been down since I left, and the guy who drew what I’m going to get done (simple banding around my sanskrit on my left arm) is down there so he’ll get to see it when it’s done. Also, Suburbfreak and I are going to go in together- she’s going to get the rest of hers done at the same time. I’m looking forward to it. Getting ink with another person is great! Also, it’s been a while since I hung out with her at all. It’s been a while since I was at Tim’s, too. Two weeks from this weekend….
Welcome home December 28, 2004
A decent practice today. I took my time. Well, that was my mental attitude. Turned out to have the same length practice as always. Funny how that happens. The room was considerably colder than my last practice in New York, so I was feeling a little less flexible. My knees were complaining- a lot. I had to back off my half-lotus poses a bit to accomodate them. There was always the feeling of cold air on my skin, even though I was sweating a bit. Happens frequently at the studio in the winter, I’ve noticed. Don’t know what that is about. I also was feeling a bit more weak than usual. Towards the end I was losing stamina big time. My back felt open though, and for the most part things went well.
And then I got laghuvajrasana. I know. Crazy. Welcome home. So much for no new poses on Tuesdays…. Anyway, in the pose, I’m pretty good, but getting into and out of it is difficult for me. My teacher, upon watching me struggle back up from it said “mmm, this one is good for you. Bandhas.” Meaning I need to work on them! As in, you need to use them more. Cool. It feels good to have a direct challenge like that. Not flexibility, but strength, and not strength in terms of pure power, but that of core musculature. I’ve learned so much about bandhas in my backbending, and now it’s time to take all of that to the next level. Very cool. I’m looking forward to that tomorrow.
Backbending was tough because my legs were very tired today for some reason. I had the flexibility and all the second series stuff had opened me way up, but at the end I didn’t have the leg strength to keep my weight on my feet while my teacher was trying to bring my hands to my ankles and I kind of collapsed onto my head. At that point I just moved my hands a bit back and straightened my arms so I could still get a good stretch out of the pose. Looking forward to the next practice. Lots to work on. That’s certainly nothing new, though, right?
I found out today that a friend has a friend with family in Sri Lanka. Very scary. Not much information is in. I have a close friend who left the day before. I didn’t know this for a day and spent a bit of time worrying about her and trying to get in touch with her family. Please send some of your heart to the families around the Indian Ocean. So much has been lost. It’s amazing that so many in our country want to support a voluntary destruction of humanity when natural disasters like these come along and do so much of that already.
Pix and Posts December 27, 2004
Well, I’ve filled in entries for my time in NYC, and added some pictures, too! I got home this evening and am totally zonked. Looking forward to practice in the morning. It’s good to be back here finally. It feels like it’s been a thousand years since I was home for some reason, even though it’s only been a week….
Oh, and I found out yesterday I got all A’s in my classes! Heeeehehehe!
New York, day 3 December 23, 2004
Well, as fabulous as the previous two days’ practices were, today was terrible. It was much warmer so I was sweating like it was midday in the sun during the summer. I actually had to wipe off my mat halfway through standing postures it was so bad. I felt bloated from the Indian food last night, and had bad bandha control as a result. Plus, my breath was all ragged. Man. I just couldn’t get control of my breathing. When the bandhas are out of whack, that’s usually all she wrote for me…. I hate it when days go like that. I was almost calmed down by the time I got to second series, but all in all, it was a very flustered practice. I did, however get adjusted to my ankles in chakra bandhasana by Guy this morning. The last two days a different teacher had come in halfway through my practices and hadn’t pushed me much in the backbending. Today I got back there. KJS was next to me for a short bit of time- she had to get to work today so she got there earlier than me, even though I was still there almost an hour earlier than yesterday (8:15) because I was meeting another friend at noon. Good to practice next to her. She’s got this nice jump into bujapidasana- looks great. Overall, it was still nice to get another practice in, but I was halfway glad when it was over, since it had been a poor one.
It decided to start pouring rain today, too. Dodging the rain (or rather running all around in it), I met an old flame for lunch. She was my first love (back five years ago) and we’ve recently sort of re-connected our friendship. She just moved to NYC from Seattle to begin dancing and is already getting parts (she’s really talented). Her boyfriend is moving out to join her in April. It was good to see her again and catch up since it’s been a little while and the last time we hung out we didn’t really get to go over much of what has happened in our lives since we knew each other before. Startling, actually, to go back in the past to things I haven’t thought about in a long time, and realize how my view on those things has changed since I last thought about them. Wild. A very good midday, and I was happy to spend time with her. It’s been three years since I was in NYC, and I have no idea how long it will be before I return, so it was nice to see people and get time with them.
Since I have an early train tomorrow and the shala will be closed anyway, neither KJS nor I will be practicing and we decided to party a little bit. I found a cool little place in SOHO and her and That Guy came and joined me for some drinks. He seems to know everything about the history of the city and it was fascinating to hear him describe the various changes that have taken place over the years. Amazing. And it was a perfect ending to the short trip here. how very nice to get a break and spend time in New York. Thanks again KJS for the hospitality and the time.
KJS and me
That Guy and KJS
New York, day 2 December 22, 2004
Met KJS this morning to walk over to the shala. She lives like a block and a half from my hostel, so it’s super convenient. Being relaxed this morning was nice, too, and since we were getting there a bit earlier than I got there yesterday, I felt less pressure. I asked Guy if I could go ahead and do the second series poses that my teacher had given me. He said sure, since he knows my teacher well. I was stoked. This practice wound up being even better than yesterday. Nice and warm, super open, good adjustments, AND second series. My back was super flexy, and the whole practice just felt like a warm blanket. Very comfy.
I noticed to my surprise that the shala was not overflowing with advanced students. It was very similar to my studio, actually. Several beginners, several people doing most of first, and a handful of students at various stages of second. I asked KJS about this at one point, making the comment that the gnarly students must show up earlier, but she said that actually there isn’t much more variation in ability than what I saw. Cool. For some reason I was expecting to see all kinds of people in third.
KJS and I went and got a very nice breakfast afterwards and since she had decided to take the day off work, we did a bit of Christmas shopping together. It began on a funny note, however, for as we turned the corner to go to one shop that I wound up buying all kinds of stuff at, we passed what we thought was a little shop selling asian statuary- the standards like Krishnas, Ganeshas, Shivas, that kind of thing. But when we walked in, it turned out to be a shop/yoga studio/temple for the followers of Ramananda. I hadn’t heard of him previously, but the shop attendant decided to offer us a tour of the elaborately decorated spaces and tell us a bit about it. I thought it was extraordinary, and was very amused to be getting such a nice lesson on the levels of samadhi via this random excursion. Only in New York! I loved it.
Christmas shopping was nice- got a lot done. Had a nap and then went to Indian food for dinner by myself. Was reading the Hatha Yoga Pradapika. I picked it up again for this trip after not reading it since before school. I’m right at the descriptions of vajroli and other such things- very intense, and also quite intriguing. For those of you who haven’t read the HYP, there are quite a few practices that are very intense beyond asana and pranayama. The commentary in the copy I have is wonderful, however, and does a good job of dealing with the more modern medical implications of some of the practices….
Planes, trains, and automobiles December 21, 2004
Got to DC yesterday afternoon and was picked up by my folks. Spent time chatting with them last night and then got on a 5am train this morning to NYC. I was determined to make it to Guy’s shala in time for a practice. I wanted to get three days in at the shala, so I sacrificed a nights sleep to pull it off. I wound up crashing out on the 3 hour train ride at various times, but I also managed to watch an amazing sunrise- don’t get to see that much on the east coast. Being the winter solstice today, the sun didn’t come up until about 7:15 or so! Crazy.
Getting to the shala was a comedy of errors. My train was late into Penn station, I got on the wrong subway- twice (btw, the R is the only train that stops at 8th street going southbound at that time in the morning, contrary to shala website directions), took too long to figure out that 8th street ends and starts again on the other side of a park, and wound up flustered and cold (it was in the 20’s that morning in the city) at the shala at 9:30. Thankfully, Guy let me start anyway, and I had a wonderful practice.
I stuck to first series mostly for tradition, but my body felt surprisingly loose and light. I felt fantastic, actually, and my practice went very smoothly. I got adjusted into mari D on both sides- that’s never happened before. Amazing. Didn’t even hurt. I’ve gotten into one side or the other many times, but never both in the same practice. Everything else went smoothly, and I wound up finishing right at eleven, was the second to last to leave, and embarked on my way to find my hostel. The shala was very pleasant, though much darker than I imagined it to be. This proved useful for concentration, though. It was also nice and warm. One of the benefits of being lazy during my vacation and showing up at 8 or 9 while I was there was that there was always 2 hours of body heat and humidity in the room when I walked in- I warmed up very quickly.
I thought I saw KJS cruise out as I was going into padangusthasana, but I wasn’t sure- I was upside down and only took my gaze off my nose for a breath when I saw her walk by on the way out. But we got together for dinner that night and met That Guy a little later. Both are very pleasant and fun people. KJS was extremely helpful and made me feel comfy right off the bat- like I was a wanted visitor to her city. Very nice. Oh, and not to mention- she’s hilarious!
Here’s the room I stayed in at the White House Hotel of New York. I think it was also a running halfway house, since one whole floor has more “permanent” residents….
Ustrasana December 19, 2004
And the hits just keep on comin’! I guess it was a Christmas present from my teacher, or a “have-fun-in-New-York” gift or something like that. Maybe a “congratulations-on-being-done-with-your-first-semester-of-grad-school” present. I dunno. But they’re here: The Second Series Backbends. Well, the ones that you don’t have to pull against gravity for anyway. I’m thrilled. I love backbending, and now I have the opportunity to go really deep. Ustrasana felt really good. I haven’t done it for some time, and my back is significantly more open than the last time, so it’s a whole new pose for me. I felt like I was able to get some good bending out of my upper back, and really focus on that part specifically.
Ironically, I wasn’t feeling terribly flexible today. I thought I would be with the release of stress, but to the contrary, I was feeling a little stiff. I felt like I was really taking my time with every pose, though a look at the clock at the end showed that I had taken the same time as any other practice. Weird. But I felt great just practicing with no pressure to be anywhere, to do anything. It was great. Nice heat, good strength- I started feeling really good around bhujapidasana, and my second series poses felt super strong- especially bhekasana. Though my knees were a little tender and my back felt like that too. Chakra bhandasana was a little tough today. My teacher didn’t hold me up as much as usual, or maybe he did, I couldn’t tell, but the bottom line was that I had a hard time straightening my arms- I was feeling pretty weak at that point. Still got a good ankle grab, but my breath was a little rough. I got a 30-breath paschimottanasana adjustment afterwards! Nice. I love the squash after the backbending. There weren’t a lot of people in the studio today, so my teacher could spend some good time with those there.
So- feeling good. I have some last-minute errands to run to get ready for my trip and I’ll probably go see a movie or something but other than that, a very chill day. The weather the last couple days has been spectacular- clear, sunny, 70’s in the sun- and I got to spend time listening to music, sitting in the sun, reading a (gasp!) magazine. The kind of stuff I used to do on the weekends before going back to school! No practice tomorrow, as I have to be at the airport at 8am, so I have to leave plenty early as it is, but I’m going to try to get something small in Tuesday morning before catching the train up to NYC at like 9 or something. Practice on Wed. and Thurs. at Guy’s studio, if everything goes to plan. I’m sooooooo looking forward to getting away- travel is the perfect reward for hard work!
Day Off December 18, 2004
It’s over. The first semester of grad school, my courses, the stress- all gone. Kinda. I mean the stress part. It just feels weird to have the whole weekend with nothing to do. I got up yesterday morning early, lit candes in one corner of my flat, and put my mat down. It wasn’t as cold as I had feared. I did my 5 As and 5 Bs, then sat for meditation for a short while. This was as much time as I felt comfy giving to my practice with a final looming at 9am. So I spent some time reviewing and then got on the bus to school. My final went well. Much better than the first one. And then I was done. I had a small amount of lab work to do, but the post-doc that I’m working with and I had planned to get our experiment wrapped up by yesterday so we wouldn’t have to come in over the weekend and because I’m leaving Monday anyway. So I went to a couple holiday parties last night- saw and met some great people, came home went to bed. This morning I just decided to enjoy my bed. I was awake before sunrise, but I just closed my eyes rolled over and drifted back to sleep with the complete bliss of having no responsibility outside of whatever domestic agenda items I wanted to accomplish this weekend.
So now I’m looking around to see how many things got neglected during the last two weeks of sprinting toward the finish…. Not much actually. I managed to keep my house organized and clean, plants are alive. But the fridge is empty, my bank account a little lower than I’d like- both symptomatic of eating out too much due to a lack of desire to cook/go to the market in the face of studying. I kept my practice up, so my health is fine, but my fingernails have taken a beating…. I gotta get over that nervous habit. Most things are fine, actually. It just feels like I haven’t paid attention to much besides my practice, my experiments, and my classes in the last two weeks. There are some phone calls I haven’t returned, some people I need to check up on, some people that should check up on me (strange how I haven’t heard from them as I’ve been stressing), some things to put away (like all the folders from this semester’s classes)- that kind of thing. Tomorrow my first free practice since I started school. Then my trip to NYC and DC. I’m very happy!
